Ever feel like you’re a failure? Or maybe it’s just that, no matter what you do, you feel as though you come up short. But, consider this: What if you’re just not meant to be successful – at least, in the way you imagine success to be?
Maybe your life is meant to be exactly what it is right now and that trying to force some sort of preconceived “successful life” on yourself is a complete waste of your number one resource: time. Not only that, but it’s putting pressure on you that is resulting in anxiety and depression and a nagging feeling that you are never good enough.
Of course, everyone deserves to be happy. If you are the kind of person that loves working and putting in that extra time to make your dreams come true, then go for it. If you truly have the talent, ability and drive to push past the barriers most of us face, then more power to you. Nothing wrong with that if it allows you to be happy and make the most of the tiny amount of time you have on this planet.
We’re all different and we have different wants, needs, and expectations.
But what about the average person that isn’t necessarily driven, hyper-focused, and relentless in their quest to be all they can be – what about that person? Should one consider themselves a failure if they don’t end up getting their dream job, large house and big bank account?
If this sounds familiar, stop beating yourself up! Not everyone is meant to be “successful.”
The Root of The Problem
Humans are unlike any other species. Even when our basic needs are met (food, clothing, shelter), we still strive for more. Have you ever really stopped to consider how screwed up that is?
Imagine if we were all content with the basics. That would free up our time to enrich our lives any way we wish. Learn a new language, paint, write, read, meditate, create, and the list goes on.
Of course, one could argue that you won’t have money to do anything. Sure, for some things, yes, but even an average achiever should be able to make enough to pay the bills. Once that is taken care of, what is needed?
Well, you could say you need money for the finer things in life. Designer clothes, travel, a flashy car, bigger house, the latest gadgets, and so forth – but do you really?
There is a price to be paid for chasing success and you can’t get something for nothing. If you are chasing a “better life,” then you’ll be making sacrifices – there’s no way around it for most people. You won’t have time to pursue your hobbies, learn new things, take in nature, spend more time with your family, or simply sit and appreciate your freedom.
It’s really up to you, how you were raised, and your view on the world. Not everyone is willing to trade their most valuable commodity (time) for a bigger bank account.
Of course, there are people who are naturally talented and thoroughly enjoy what they do. I assume most billionaires do what they do because they are passionate, not because they need more money. The same goes for movie stars, rock stars, professional athletes, etc – I’m willing to bet that these people are passionate about what they do and they just happen to have gotten rich in the process.
It’s hard to talk about people like that in the same way you would a person grinding away at a job they couldn’t care less about, all to increase their income in order to have a better life. This is the person that is really losing out. Hey, we all can’t get rich pursuing our passions – most times, you just have to trade time for money – but it’s knowing when enough is enough.
The Environment
One of the root causes of climate change is that we humans keep demanding more – bigger everything, and more of it. Imagine if we all had large homes to heat/cool, big gas guzzling vehicles, and took one or more vacations a year? We’d be in big trouble, obviously; the planet could never sustain that.
So, if you feel you are an underachiever according to society’s standards, relax and look at the big picture; you are helping the planet because you’re only taking what you really need. Even if you find yourself in this position unwillingly, it’s still comforting to know that you are contributing something by not using as much as the average person.
You Might Live Longer
It’s well known that stress is a killer. If all you are doing is the minimum, then by rights, you should live longer than a high achiever.
Workers continue to work harder for less money. If you want a rich lifestyle, then you need to work more than the average person. As inflation eats away at puny wage increases, it’s going to put a lot of stress on you to maintain that high standard of living.
Don’t get me wrong though, if you don’t make enough to cover basic expenses, then the stress of extreme poverty will likely cut your life short as well.
Ultimately, you have to find that sweet spot. I have friends in situations where both husband and wife work more than 40 hours a week each. They don’t have to, but it allows them to live in their chosen neighbourhood. While they both earn a good wage, it’s eaten up by the lifestyle they’ve chosen.
Who am I to judge though? I don’t say anything to anyone; it’s none of my business. I just write about it in this blog – which, for the most part, is anonymous. We all have our own private opinions about people in our lives I think.
I’m sure that I have friends and family who think I’m a lazy underachiever, layabout; I don’t really care as long as they keep their opinions to themselves. Having said that, maybe some of them get me as well and wish they were able to do the same.
I don’t hurt anyone. I don’t live off the system. I don’t have much money, but I’m debt free. I do, however, have a lot of time to do the things they can’t. Maybe there’s a little jealousy there, I don’t know.
I wake up when I want. I work when I feel like it. I can take time to do the things that give me pleasure, even if that’s just going for a hike with my dog in the middle of the day, in the middle of the week when the crowds are gone; to me, that’s what life is all about.
So look… take it easy on yourself. No one says you have to burn yourself out to achieve some sort of preconceived idea of success. Look past that to the things in life that are free, but priceless as well.
